Book Poem

Book binding is far from easy. Regardless, I made a book following Dean Young:

Shamanism 101

by Dean Young

Like everyone, I wanted my animal

to be the hawk.

I thought I wanted the strength

to eat the eyes first then tear

into the fuse box of the chest

and soar away.

I needed help because I still

cowered under the shadow of my father,

a man who inspected picture tubes

five out of seven nights,

who woke to breakfast on burnt roast

except the two weeks he’d sleep

on a Jersey beach and throw me

into the gasoline-sheened waves.

I loved him dying indebted

not knowing to what,

thinking his pension would be enough,

released not knowing from what,

gumming at something I was afraid

to get close enough to hear, afraid

of what I was co-signing. So maybe

the elephant. The elephant knows

when one of its own is suffering

up to six miles away. Charges across

the desert cognizant of the futility.

How can I be forgiven when I don’t know

what I need forgiving for? Sometimes

the urges are too extreme: to slap

on the brakes and scream, to bite the haunch

of some passing perfume, so maybe my animal

is the tiger. Or shark.

Or centipede.

But I know I’m smaller than that,

filling notebooks with clumsy versions

of one plaint, one pheromonal call,

clamoring over a crumb that I think

is the world, baffled by the splotch

of one of my own crushed kind,

almost sweet, a sort of tar,

following a trail of one or two molecules,

leaving a trail

of one or two molecules.


My images in the book reflect some of the visual imagery from the poem, such as the Jersey shore. The pages themselves also progressively get smaller and darker, reflective of how the character feels about himself. The cover is the image of a sad mask, that when opened, exposes the poem full of animal masks, that the character is trying to hide behind. Below are some images that are in the poem book.

Final Triptych

Really, my digital editing skills have increased tremendously since I first started the class, especially photoshop. I am still working on developing my illustrator skills, but luckily I asked for the program for christmas. Below is a description and concept of my triptych and the final visuals.

My triptych was an eclectic collection of imagery and ideas from my life. The three together contain the “four elements” being earth, air, fire, and water…each panel having at least one of the elements to balance a theme in my life.

The first panel, having air, represents the spiritual side of me, comprising of religious influences from both my mother and father, being Hinduism and Catholicism, respectively.

Another piece is grounded on earth, like my earthly pursuits, such as a career in medical illustration. This career entails involvement and understanding of the human body and nature.

The last piece is a collection of fantastical images and ideas surrounding my life. Having both water and fire, there area dualities and challenges to every aspect, but the trick is to approach life with as much whimsy and enthusiasm as possible.

I did have complications with the presentation of my piece, both in concept and execution. I was a little embarrassed to present the piece because I am used to looking more professional. Conceptually I had hoped to incorporate a presentation piece that incorporated the “four elements.” While I did find something that exemplified this, it was extremely expensive, and I think I lost creativity after seeing that one piece.

Allie Binaco and I created an interesting exhibit idea incorporating the works of Daniel Canogar and Rafael Lozano-Hemmer. In the exhibit, Peripheral Circuitry, their works highlight the unique interaction held between people and technology, how it is a necessary component that is often taken for granted or not blantantly observed as a function in our lives. Both artists express how technology has potential dark and light sides, where the overuse or surveillance aspect of technology can take hold of people, intertwining them with almost no release. Their more positive pieces show how people can be united through the use of technology.

Below are the websites of the artists, showing their purpose and their collection of work.

Daniel Canogar Home Page
http://www.danielcanogar.com/page_in/index.html
Rafael Lozano-Hemmer
http://www.lozano-hemmer.com/eproyecto.html

Word Visualization

We were given an interesting illustrator project in which we were to pick a word from a list, and manipulate the visual appearance of the text such that is suited to meaning of the word. I chose the word "grow" and instantly had an image of a flower growing from the root to the blooming flower. Below is an image that reflects growing...

Self-Visualization Concept

So, my concept for my self-visualization project has had a complete turn-a-round. My initial concept focused on how I have struggled in my life and how people have failed to hear me and what I have been trying to say...basically I put myself on the pity path. After my initial concept failed to translate well to viewers, I was forced to take a second look at my project. It was at this time I decided it was bad karma to say, oh woe is me, and decided my project shall be more optimistic.

Obviously being a triptych, there are three main components to my project, highlighting three different emphases in my life. One focus would be a spiritual side, derived from my religious upbringings (and rejection of organized religion). I place myself in the form of the goddess Lakshmi, a Hindu goddess of great meaning to my mother; Lakshmi is the goddess of beauty, wisdom, and fortune. I use this symbol because it is an obvious religious icon and also because Hindu deities conveniently have many arms- this is ideal for me balancing and using several items in my life as pillars of strength (each arm will be holding a representational symbol for each "pillar"). My body shall be overlaying prayers that have encouraged me, despite their ties to difference churches, and various symbols of beauty.

A second focus in my life is my education. College has been an interesting quest to figure out what I really want to do. Even though I was never quite sure, I was always enthusiastic to learn more. I hope this image translates its meaning, but I plan to have a child-like me, full of curiosities and ambition, facing an older, calmer me....the older me I have skeleton figure overlaying my body image to represent my interest in anatomy.

Lastly, I have a centerpiece image of me having slain my demons, whether it be financial or greater attempts at maturity. It represents that "happy place" that you hear TV psychologists talk about, where my loved ones feel close to me, and it would be safe for me to carry my heart on my sleeve. I am still working out the kinks of exactly how the composition will look, but I imagine it will have the negative aspects washed out and in the background with representational symbols in the foreground...working that out.

...we shall see

So over the past few weeks I have had ridiculous opportunities to practice illustrator and photoshop. Considering I was a novice in both of the areas, I feel as though I had made major leaps in progress. Although I am not nearly as experienced as my friend PJ, a fellow art student, I feel I have learned exceptionally more than the average person, which was more than I anticipated.

My first photoshop concept was perhaps not the best for the digital medium, but it still came out looking very vivid (in my opinion). My boyfriend thankfully posed for me...I wanted a scene that elicited a sense of meloncholy and reminesence. The character is longingly looking down at a photo album, and images from his past appear to haunt him.



Further, we learned to work in Illustrator. Before all else, we practiced a simple tracing technique. It turned out to be slightly more difficult that I initially thought, although it all turned out for the best.


Finally we proceeded to practice skills and techniques in Illustrator involving our "Film Still Visualization" project, which is reflected in the image above. Below are some simple renditions in Illustrator... They are nothing complex, but simply practice with some Illustratory tools.

My first Photoshop...

Our first project is going to be very exciting... Since this class is a complete introduction to Photoshop for me, this has been the perfect opportunity for me to learn and experiment with the editing tools. Interestingly, my greatest challenge thus far has been conceptualizing Photoshop ideas. Although I can take (what I think is) an interesting picture, I will be baffled on what to do with it and see its potential. For my first project I will be working with an image of a man, sorrowed in his now emptied apartment looking at images from his past (yeah, I tried to make the description of the picture sound fancy). I think it is an interesting picture from which I hope to develop through photoshop means.

Photographers of the Modern Age

In class we were given the opportunity to look at several artists that often use photography as a popular medium. Such artists include Gregory Crewdson, Jeff Wall, and Cindy Sherman. Although they use the same medium, their work, of course, was very distinctive. They all appear to look at different aspects of human emotion, interaction, and intrigue.

Gregory Crewdson looks at a very dark side of human behavior. In his early work, he focused on animals and nature while still highlighting that humans do not acknowledge certain aspects of life. Similarly in his later work, people are not involved with understanding other life, or fully understanding their own. In focuses are the darker moments of human life where we seem isolated and confused in our own world.

Jeff Wall is more intimate with his photographic scenes. He appears to be capturing moments, whether active or not, of normal human emotions which appear to include racism, homelessness, disdain, etc.

Cindy Sherman, whose work started in the 70's, has a wonderful understanding of lines and textures as they appear on film, especially considering digital retouching was not yet available at the start of her career. Her images seem empowering, especially for women, and has the potential to glorify a mundane moment without being overpowering.

Collectively I feel they have all captured something more than ordinary human activity, but moments, expressions, or impressive emotions.

Inspirations In My Art World

I am been inspired by an infinite number of things at any given moment-some constant and some temporary influences. Of my recent art influences, I have been inspired by traditional artists (thank you Art History), humbling moments captured on film, and of course images reflecting my medical illustration interests.

Of the following images I have a cover done by Karen Roth for Science, who is a respected medical illustrator who has spoken with me and given me some hope for career aspirations. I was really grateful to hear from her to give me insight into that career path. The second image is a cover from the novel Chrysalis. Both images are very scientific and precise, yet still very elegant and done with artistic style. That is what i love about them...

About Me

I am currently an undergraduate at The College of New Jersey with a major in Psychology, concentration in Biopsychology, and a minor in Fine Arts. I have always had a passion for the two field areas in that I have had a tremendous interest in helping people and expressing myself artistically. As I entered college, professors and class experience has helped focus my interests and goals.

In terms of psychology, despite my clear interest in wanting to help others, I have steered away from clinical psychology (therapy sessions, counseling, etc), and have redirected my interests toward research where I can help people through indirect means, by helping behind the scenes. If I continue with research in my career path, I could go a number of paths. I am potentially looking into applied research where I would further investigate how to improve daily living for the neurologically impaired. I may also look into human factors psychology, where I would make everyday objects used for everyday life more functional.

My interest in art has developed very differently, however. Since childhood I have loved drawing (like every other kid) but assumed...and was told that I could not make a successful future with art. In college my boyfriend convinced me to pick up an art minor, knowing my love for art. Doing this, my passion has intensified and one of my recent professors mentioned a very interesting career path- medical illustration. I thought this was a fascinating career opportunity and quickly started investigating, despite my major in psychology which has only minor implications in medical illustration.